Family-Based Neuro-Behavioral and
Psychological Treatment and Training


"Building Brains and Bettering Bonds"

Why Restitutional Mediation?

At 10 p.m., October 1, 1943, the Nazis were to round up and deport 7,500 Danish Jews to the death camps. Non-Jewish Danish citizens, from all walks of life, some only teenagers, risked their lives to rescue all but 481 Jews by boat and by bus. They sneaked them away to safety and freedom in neutral Sweden.

Louis Bulow: Denmark, Rescue of the Danish Jews; www.auschwitz.dk

Altruism is the highest act of selflessness. How many of us could love deeply enough to put our brother and sister first even if it meant giving our life to do so? How many of us have developed our conscience and our courage to the point that we can look fear in the face and do the right thing to help make the world a better place? Developing altruism is about making love stronger…stronger than fear: Strong enough to defeat apathy and self-centeredness.

If you’re reading this, then it is more than likely you’d like to see children grow up to be successful, loving, giving, altruistic adults who can and who do put another’s needs before their own, without being taken advantage of, of course. Restitutional mediation is a tool to help parents and teachers help their children become more responsible to self and others, stronger in spirit, stronger than fear, and empathetic instead of apathetic.

When does one use restitutional mediation?

When there is a clear offender and a clear perpetrator. In the following pages, you’ll read two situations, both real-life examples, where restitutional mediation was the successful remedy to correct what had happened. It’s helpful when a child has wronged another child, or maybe when a child has wronged an adult, and the adult may be you. Sometimes sorry just isn’t enough. We are trying to teach our children good morals and values. When someone has to face off with someone in a controlled, adult-supervised setting to hear about the hurt they have caused from the person they caused the hurt to, and make reparations, it helps to instill a better conscience and promote better cause-effect thinking.

Does the one who offended get to forego punishment if they participate in restitutional mediation?

No, that’s not real life. Our poor decisions should have consequences so that we don’t do it again. The purpose of restitutional mediation is to develop empathy, honesty, responsibility and real courage.

What about the one who was victimized? How does restitutional mediation help them?

By helping the person attain the inner strength to speak up and speak out against that which is wrong. Again: to develop courage, so they can better protect themselves and others.

Doesn’t restitutional mediation stigmatize the offender?

Not if it’s done correctly. Children aren’t bad people. Children are in training to be successful adults. Restitutional mediation is a part of the training.

 

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